Early call to bootcamp
Posted By: Tamara Johnson 01-10-12
My daughter got the call today that she leaves for bootcamp on Jan 23, 2012. I knew it was coming. Did not expect my reaction to the news. I have always felt and tried to teach my kids to be strong and fearless. In particular the girls. I have 4 kids and have basically raised them on my own. Now my first born, my precious little girl, who has been a true inspiration to me is joining the Marines.
I am so proud!!!!! Yet so scared. I cannot say that joining the Military is a mistake, but this is not what I had envisioned for her. I thought before the economy went to hell that we would be able to provide for her to get thru college with no debt, not like we had. Sadly, that is not the case. It seems like a good idea to serve and that is her best option to advance herself and her goals but it is different.
When I was leaving for college, it was close to the start of Operation Desert Storm and I could not even imagine going myself. As time went on, I saw military people come out of that engagement and they seemed different then how they were before they went. I am so proud that she is fearless enough to go and enlist. But I worry that my inablitly to support her finacially thru college will cost her more than money can ever compensate for. She has been a cross country runner in high school. And if you have ever done or seen the training that the XO kids go thru, they really do push themselves and their teammates. She is more prepared physically for the challenges of bootcamp then what most people are. I thought I was at one time I was tough. But seeing her at practice, hearing her recruiters and friends talk about her excellence and commitment. I know now, I was only tough in my own mind. She has to be tough for us all and that is something I would have never thought of when I was 17. Well off she goes, to SC in 2 weeks.
I am so proud but the tears of pride and reservation wont stop flowing. I cant really show her how scared I am cause I dont want her to think I dont believe in her or doubt her. I just think so much of her and her brave decision. She constantly jokes with me about wanting to get to Afgan. I know it is real, i just hope she knows it too. There is so much to say to her, so much I want her to understand before she leaves. I am at a loss.
I love her and all I can hope is that she will eventually understand how much I love her and how hard it is to let her go. Not just into the big, world as an adult, but into the big, bad world as a defender of our country.
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