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Lynda Torres Avatar


Advice to new Recruit Single Mothers

Posted By: Lynda Torres 09-20-10

Single moms are stronger than we realize and when your only child makes the decision and joins the military, do not feel alone, you are not losing your child to the military - you are gaining a ton of new sons and daughters. Whether your son/ daughter left yesterday, last week or last month, write to them. They need to hear that you are okay, that you still support them-still love them and still believe in them. Send them encouragement through your letters, encourage them to continue their journey, talk about your plans to come see them at Family Day and Graduation. Share funny stories with them, make them feel like they are still connected to home through the letters and take lots of pictures on Family Day and Graduation Day of them, share pictures from home with them that day. Always remember they are becoming more than an adult now - they are becoming a United States Marine after the 13-weeks and they will still need you-but don't baby them- love them support them and believe in them-you will not regret your decision or theirs when you see them march into the Family Day Ceremony. Only send them things from home if and when they ask for them, they receive plenty of food and good food too to eat there and home-made items they are not used to having could interfere with their new healthy diet and exercise. You might get short letters but don't get worried sometimes they are limited on time. They have responsibilities there to keep their barracks, uniforms and gear squared away and ready for the next day. So be patient-keep writing to them anyways, follow their weather online to see what their weather and temps are like compared to yours. Tell them positive things going on back home, good news from friends and relatives. Belief in them and in yourself will get your through it. When you child makes it to the next day after watching someone drop might make them nervous but reassure them that they can do this and they are stronger than they thought possible. They will be more determined each time they see what they have accomplished and they will grow with each day and find self-pride and self-confidence each time they succeed at an event/ overcome an obstacle-complete another day! When you receive the Graduation packet and Vehicle Pass you will know the long journey through boot camp is almost over. They will be sending you these things and they will know they are in the home stretch-celebrate each accomplishment through letters that they share with you. You will both be surprised. When they earn the title of U. S. Marine you will earn the title of U. S. Marine Mother (the toughest job in the Corps). Pat yourself on the back and know that you helped them get there! The Title of U. S. Marine is earned, never given and once earned no one can ever take that away from them! Be proud of them and yourself! OO-RAH!

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Comments (6)

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Christine Hotop Avatar


Thank You. My daughter left on Monday February 13th.

Posted by: Christine Hotop on 02/16/2012




Denise  Austin Avatar


Thank You so much for your words of wisdom. It has been extremely helpful. My only son left a week ago for MCRD San Diego and I feel like my best friend moved away. No one can really relate to this and I feel so alone. So your words of encouragement are and what to write is very helpful. Still waiting for the address. I am so very proud of him and all our recruits. Thanks Lynda

Posted by: Denise Austin on 01/07/2011




Linda Stevenson Avatar


Thank you for your post, Lynda. Lots of good info and advice - it really helped.

Laurie - I know exactly what you mean about that phone call and the yelling! Our son sounded mad at the world when he was reading that script! I wish I'd thought to let the machine 'pick up' - we knew the call would be coming at some point, so his dad made me take the portable upstairs with us when we went to bed just in case. I was in deep sleep when the phone rang - took two rings and his dad yelling at me to "ANSWER THE PHONE!" (lol) before I fumbled for it and said "Hello." Hindsight's always 20/20, but now, I wish we'd pre-arranged that we would let the machine pick up before we did - at least we would have had a recording of that call. I think our son would have loved to have it to listen to later - and I KNOW I would have, yelling or not!

I miss him so much - and not looking forward to Christmas without him AT ALL. : (

Posted by: Linda Stevenson on 12/16/2010




Sandra Burns Avatar


Adding to what Lynda says, I will recommend the parents to visit the Parris Island website, follow the schedule. It's posted by week and also daily. It also has the Crucible schedule. Congratulations to all of you!

Posted by: Sandra Burns on 12/16/2010




christina n/a Avatar


those words were inspirational but unfortunately im not a Marines mother i am a Marine girlfriend. but pretty much suffering the same pain... i cry everyday since he left on september 13

Posted by: christina n/a on 09/22/2010




Laurie Amesquita Avatar


Being a single mom I really enjoyed reading this, my daughter (my only child) left for Parris Island on Monday Sept 20th. Wednesday evening is when I received the 12 second phone call. I was in such shock of the call and the manner in which she was yelling I didn't pay full attention to what she was telling me. At least I know she is finally there is a big relief. I'm staying positive and can't wait for the Graduation Ceremony and to give her a big hug. I already have a 5 page letter written just waiting on an address. Once again Thanks, Laurie

Posted by: Laurie Amesquita on 09/22/2010